Now, to be clear, this beaver problem reflects a broader issue that faces folks in North America—after a period of history when beavers were hunted for their fur, the population of the beaver is simply growing, which means these flat-tailed rodents are going to become increasingly in conflict with modern human activity, Canadian symbol or not.
The Humane Society admits
that beavers are an active nuisance that can cause external issues, but that there are better ways to deal with them than trapping.
Whatever the case, none of this excuses what these beavers did to the internet. I mean, HOW COULD THEY. Do they not know what’s on the internet, how great it is? Have they never spent an hour watching tech videos on YouTube just because? Have they never considered that reloading Pitchfork for the 51st time today won’t tell you much more than what you learned the first or second time you loaded that site? What it’s like to type in a URL on a mechanical keyboard?
Of course not. They’re beavers. And they have now created a new enemy in me. Do not mess with the internet, boys.